Interfaith Playdates, 2009 (or 5770, if you like)

Across the street we have a cute Bot-aged little guy who USED TO COME OVER AND SPEAK IN ALL CAPS AS HIS WAY OF MAKING SURE HE WAS HEARD AND HEEDED AT ALL TIMES. Sometime between now and Jake sitting at the Blue and Gold Cub Scout dinner at the same table with the kid and worrying that three feet was not outside the spitting-bread-while-TALKING-IN-ALL-CAPS range of this child, he has matured in all respects and is even known to speak in quieter tones -- when I can hear him over Bot, who has TAKEN TO TALKING IN CAPS WHEN HIS FRIENDS ARE OVER.

Anyway, back when we first met him, he and Liam has a lengthy discussion in the back of the van one day about the differences between Jews and Christians. I can't remember the details, but I remember they were adorably serious to the point of hilarity. The kid clearly is well aware that he is Jewish and that Christians and Jews are different, and is eager to point out and mention these differences at every opportunity.

So yesterday, after sending the boys outside....Well, I sent them outside under some duress. You see, joining these Friday playdates recently are Chris and Gabe, our beloved buddies from our old house on Gregory. Since Nikki picks them up from school, she can also pick up Truman so I don't have to drive up the to the school and retrieve him from the After School program after Garrett's bus comes in. One Friday, Nikki went to pick up Tru as she'd been doing for three Fridays and Truman insisted that his dad was picking him up and he was not coming to my house that day. I called to inform the dad of this, since After School only goes to a certain point in the afternoon and I didn't want him to miss the closing time and get charged for late pick-up because he thought Tru was with me. The dad informed me that no doubt his son simply wanted to play on the computer in the computer lab, but he had plenty enough time on the computer in general and he should have more time with his friends playing and running and using his imagination, and that he would inform his son that if Nikki or I ever came to pick him up, he should go with us.

So when they showed up at my house with Chris and Truman extolling the virtues of Club Penguin, some children's online thing I've heard about because Truman lent his Club Penguin Handbook to Bot and Bot kept leaving it all over the house and I kept carefully putting it aside because it was not one of our books and I knew the kid would want it back when I was least expecting it, I put off letting them go on the computer by telling them that they should go outside now while it was not yet dark to see the two plastic playhouses we recently acquired (Kayleigh made friends with a lady in line at Bed Bath and Beyond who had one fourteen-yr-old and was getting rid of the little-kid toys in her yard, so she gave me her number and we went and got a little plastic log cabin from her. While Jake was heroically taking the thing apart, a friend of hers called and asked what she was doing, so she told her about this guy with eight kids taking her log cabin apart and the friend said, "Hey, we have a cute little house like that in our yard the kids don't play with anymore, do you think he wants another one?" I'm set to open a daycare in our yard if my own kids didn't already put me over the required child/adult ratios...)

"So, we have to go outside?"

"Yeah, you can go outside! One of the houses has a doorbell! And I'll bring your snack out there--hurry up, before it gets dark, you only have a little while before it gets dark!"

Out they went. When they came in and stated solemnly, "Um, Sue?

It's getting dark, so...."

I knew they were looking to get on the computer, but I put on a clueless look. "It is? OK, here!" and handed them a flashlight.

The conversation didn't go they way they expected, but hey, they had a flashlight, so back out they went. When they finally came in for good, I let them go on the computer, but after half an hour I called in to Bot that they only had five minutes. Chris came out and said, "Wow, and Bot hasn't even had a chance yet!"

Turns out Truman had "helped" Bot get a few items for his penguin, and play a few games, and such, and so when I explained that if your hand is on the mouse, it's your turn, so if it's not your turn, your hand must be off the mouse, and so on. Then I got a long litany of "And then I.....And then I....And then I....." concluding with "And now the screen is just sitting here and won't DO anything!"

"Oh, well, gee, I'm sure Liam could help you but he and Nick are playing Xbox and Nick has to leave soon for his hockey game, so I hate to interrupt them. Go do something else until the older boys are free." No way I was going to let on that *I* could possibly be of any help.

Then lots of complaining and whining started about who did what wrong to mess up whose turn (and yes, Truman, in his painful withdrawal from the computer, began to complain that he never even GOT his BOOK back), so I walked by, handed them the book, and pointedly and loudly commented, "WOW, if this is what it's like when you guys get on the computer, maybe we should avoid the computer from now on, or even things with any screen at all..." Suddenly people got a lot more cheerful-sounding.

So while I was making a lame Friday night dinner with Garrett--hot dogs wrapped in crescent roll dough--I heard some more imaginative play, and was happy. But then I began to hear lots of references to "Jewish people" and "Christians" coming from the living room, so I finally got to a stopping point and went around the corner to listen in.

Truman was sitting in the chair with a Santa hat, and Bot was just hopping off "Santa's" lap. "OK, now pretend you're Jewish!" Truman ordered.

Bot hammed it up with a melodramatic, "I'm Jewish, but I want presents, too, Santa!"

"Santa" then directed, "Then I tell you that I'm Jewish, too, and you kick me in the balls."

Needless to say, this is when I began to SPEAK IN ALL CAPS FOR A WHILE.