Giving Pregnancy a Good Name

So, you'd think that in having seven babies I'd manage to give pregnancy a positive image--it is, after all, something I do often, and get excited (and cranky, and nauseous, and tired) about, and Bot especially looks forward to the babies and gets all cutesie about them. But as for Bot's image of pregnancy...

G was helping pick up train tracks in the playroom after I asked Alex to help clean them up and Alex refused, when Garrett said out of nowhere, "Mom, do you have a belly button?"

"I do. Does everyone have belly buttons?"

"Yes."

"And does everyone have a penis?"

"Yes."

"Nope--only boys have them. Girls don't."

Bot turned at that one. "Why the heck" (everything these days is "the heck" to Bot) "are you talking about THAT?"

Good question, and I'm not totally sure, but I guess I figured with G and Alex and Dunc around for the anatomy lesson, I should just cover the bases and make sure we were all clear on the basic boy-girl differences. But it did make me wonder if going from belly buttons to more private anatomy in one jump was really appropriate, so I got self-conscious and opted not to mention the whole Kindergarten Cop "Girls have a vagina" line. But my mouth was already opening so I limited what came out to "Girls have babies. Can boys have babies?"

G was hesitant and gave his default answer: "I don't know."

"No. Boys can't have babies--only women can have babies."

Bot then chirped up. "I am SO glad I don't ever have to deal with all the--the--" I was so sure he was about to say "the pain of childbirth" since the deliberate use of an overheard phrase like that would be so like him, but instead he blurted: "The getting huge and looking like a hippopotamus!!!"

He beamed a huge mischievous smile at me, and I grinned right back with mock indignation, but I did note that he was sticking close to the doorway of the playroom, and also noted that it was a wise move. Not a dummy, my son.

Of course, I still know where he sleeps. And few people know what stealthy hunters hippos can be.

Update: A friend of mine sent me this link after reading my email--looks like hippos and I have a lot more in common than pregnancy!

http://www.straightdope.com/mailbag/mhippo.html