"You sound so sane!"
Sometimes I get comments along the lines of "How do you do it? I can barely handle TWO!" The short answer I like to give to "How do you do it?" is simply, "Poorly." My three year old is lucky if he's had a book read to him for each year of his life so far, and my youngest thinks books are teething toys. Most don't believe me when i give that answer, or at least can't admit they believe me and still be polite. But here's the thing for those who "only" have two...
Remember that four of mine are in school. Now, back when I had Bot (#4) in May and Liam was still not going to kindergarten till September, well, though at the time I didn't think it was all that big a deal now I would happily accept any sympathy thrown my way for that period of life. I am well-seasoned, so at 8:15 every morning I suddenly have just two kids and it feels like nothing. I turn on PBS for the 3-yr-old and plop the baby with a biter biscuit in the high chair and read something over a cup of tea. When they all come home, it's crazy, but I've had all day to get ready for it, and though any of the kids can drive me up a wall and none are perfect, I can call on my 11 and 7-yr-olds, and even my autistic 9-yr-old, to go get something I need or give something to some younger child or even empty the garbage. Yes, I have more kids, but the older ones keep getting older and I have this past year come to realize that I truly can put them to work. I'm hoping the word "indentured servant" doesn't pop up in social studies for a while.
I was frazzled with two, through having three...Well, and four, those early days with four were horrible if I look back objectively. When I say that I remember being exhausted and stressed when i had only two, I'm not politely throwing a bone to those with fewer kids, I'm totally serious. Two is HARD. Everything you're doing with the first you're doing for the first time, and with a young child which involves more of our energy--think of the difference between dropping off a 5th-grader at school on the first day ("Bye, Mom!" "Bye, Kid!"), and having to take a 3-yr-old in to preschool for the first time ever--figuring out how to get out of the house on time, take off and put on coats, shoes, help to carry everything, have to hold their hands or carry them, dealing with truly irrational brains, separation anxiety, potty stuff...So there is getting broken in to everything for the first, plus taking along a baby everywhere while doing it. We had one car then, plus i knew almost no one in the area, and no help or sitter--so more often than not I felt like leaving the house was not worth the effort! (I still would rather not leave home most of the time, but I've gotten pretty good at it and I have indentured servants now.)
So, by now, I have three times the kids, but I'm quite broken in, my husband is broken in and his housetraining is proceeding nicely, the older kids are even more helpful, and the younger ones are definitely more easily self-occupied than the older ones were as babies and toddlers--there's just more going on, more to watch and they are used to going with the flow.
Oh, and dinner? Lame. My husband has told me to make my peace with that, that there's nothing wrong with some form of meat plus a bit of salad taken from a bag and thrown on their plates or a few carrots. And it does make things easier and me calmer. I don't think I've cooked a real major sit-down proper hot-entree-with-hot-sides dinner, whatever that means, more than once a month since i got pregnant with Dunc.
As for the "You sound so sane!" line of coments, well, I only sound sane to people who aren't my husband or offspring. I keep telling people that someday my oldest is going to write his memoirs and tell the world how NOT-together and impatient and insane I actually was as a mom, and people think I'm joking, but trust me, I'm not! So if i hang around other moms, I can maintain sanity while they're there. You should come on over, then, and help keep me on my best behavior by joining our chaos!
Sue F :)
Remember that four of mine are in school. Now, back when I had Bot (#4) in May and Liam was still not going to kindergarten till September, well, though at the time I didn't think it was all that big a deal now I would happily accept any sympathy thrown my way for that period of life. I am well-seasoned, so at 8:15 every morning I suddenly have just two kids and it feels like nothing. I turn on PBS for the 3-yr-old and plop the baby with a biter biscuit in the high chair and read something over a cup of tea. When they all come home, it's crazy, but I've had all day to get ready for it, and though any of the kids can drive me up a wall and none are perfect, I can call on my 11 and 7-yr-olds, and even my autistic 9-yr-old, to go get something I need or give something to some younger child or even empty the garbage. Yes, I have more kids, but the older ones keep getting older and I have this past year come to realize that I truly can put them to work. I'm hoping the word "indentured servant" doesn't pop up in social studies for a while.
I was frazzled with two, through having three...Well, and four, those early days with four were horrible if I look back objectively. When I say that I remember being exhausted and stressed when i had only two, I'm not politely throwing a bone to those with fewer kids, I'm totally serious. Two is HARD. Everything you're doing with the first you're doing for the first time, and with a young child which involves more of our energy--think of the difference between dropping off a 5th-grader at school on the first day ("Bye, Mom!" "Bye, Kid!"), and having to take a 3-yr-old in to preschool for the first time ever--figuring out how to get out of the house on time, take off and put on coats, shoes, help to carry everything, have to hold their hands or carry them, dealing with truly irrational brains, separation anxiety, potty stuff...So there is getting broken in to everything for the first, plus taking along a baby everywhere while doing it. We had one car then, plus i knew almost no one in the area, and no help or sitter--so more often than not I felt like leaving the house was not worth the effort! (I still would rather not leave home most of the time, but I've gotten pretty good at it and I have indentured servants now.)
So, by now, I have three times the kids, but I'm quite broken in, my husband is broken in and his housetraining is proceeding nicely, the older kids are even more helpful, and the younger ones are definitely more easily self-occupied than the older ones were as babies and toddlers--there's just more going on, more to watch and they are used to going with the flow.
Oh, and dinner? Lame. My husband has told me to make my peace with that, that there's nothing wrong with some form of meat plus a bit of salad taken from a bag and thrown on their plates or a few carrots. And it does make things easier and me calmer. I don't think I've cooked a real major sit-down proper hot-entree-with-hot-sides dinner, whatever that means, more than once a month since i got pregnant with Dunc.
As for the "You sound so sane!" line of coments, well, I only sound sane to people who aren't my husband or offspring. I keep telling people that someday my oldest is going to write his memoirs and tell the world how NOT-together and impatient and insane I actually was as a mom, and people think I'm joking, but trust me, I'm not! So if i hang around other moms, I can maintain sanity while they're there. You should come on over, then, and help keep me on my best behavior by joining our chaos!
Sue F :)
posted by Jake Freivald at
11:17 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Links to this post:
Create a Link
<< Home